X-Git-Url: http://git.shadowcat.co.uk/gitweb/gitweb.cgi?a=blobdiff_plain;f=quotefile;h=bb2bfbed8c4a8b37ff397820278d4d4729771aa2;hb=HEAD;hp=cefe62a8a11ec2dddfb06f97f2c55ca24f34793e;hpb=f10bdb84ebb33109599eba769781f1dc14645acc;p=scpubgit%2Fmst-quotefile.git diff --git a/quotefile b/quotefile index cefe62a..bb2bfbe 100644 --- a/quotefile +++ b/quotefile @@ -15288,3 +15288,386 @@ Despair for the future of humanity. Buy Whiskey. < erry> r/nononono < mst> I guess whether that makes sense depends on whether you have a Donald Trump fetish +% +< geir> Is there a word for misspelling words because you usually write + something similar? Such as serve => server, or normal => normail. +< perigrin> I call it 'typing' +% +< erry> me: accidentally cmd+p on my mac terminal +< erry> the terminal: shows me a print preview, complete with syntax + highlighting colours +< erry> me: youtriedstar.jpg +% + heh. it just occurred to me that the people I used to refer to as + 'right SJWs' are even better described as 'Mirror Universe Wokescolds' + OMG WOKESCOLD LORCA + Mr Rhys, could I trouble you to whine at something +% +< nox> mst: Yeah saw the entire thread and when I was reading the lack of + caffeine part I almost walked head first in a pole in the street + so that was pretty appropriate +% +Attempting an earnest conversation with someone from Gawker on Twitter is +like attempting to play Risk with a dog. + - Jesse Singal +% +< EvanCarroll> HALLO EVERYONE IT IS I, EVAN THE GREAT + * mst removes the top three layers of your skin +< mst> BEHOLD, EVAN THE GRATED +< thrig> probably a lot of grating for a pound of flesh +% +< Altreus> It's an extra skill, I've found, to build one in a tiny iron stove + that you can barely fit a damn log in. +< Kassandry> Or you chop the logs smaller, burn a hotter fire, and be toasty. +< Altreus> I tried chopping them. I broke the patio. +% +< dbohdan> Let's wait until Friday the 13th and see what simcop2387 posts + before we judge his authenticity +< simcop2387> so you're asking for a bunch of gay porn then? +< dbohdan> Only for verification process +% + * mst wonders if docker's corporate disclosure statements include as a risk + factor "loss of essential institutional knowledge due to accidentally + forgetting to only ever buy edible crayons for the office" +% +< perigrin> you gotta take that in the context of when mst does + front-end work … +< perigrin> there isn't enough compiler to make scream for him + to be comfortable +% +< Obormot\Arcturus> Barefoot? Bah, that is for uncivilized savages +< mst> -!- mst is now known as uncivilised_savage +< mst> though of course I still had to correct the spelling - after all, I + might be uncivilised but I wouldn't want to be mistaken for *American* +% +< tirnanog> which is not what you have in the paste. +< gloin> ... d'oh + * gloin goes off to rearrange the cargo crates on the beach so they + somewhat more resemble an aircraft +% +< Berge> _Slightly_ worried for a moment there since you mentioned AWS (-: +< depesz> not rds. come on. +< Berge> Would be very out of character for you! +< mst> right, clearly depesz is an aurora fanatic +% +< mesaoptimizer2> maybe she was a very aggressive lesbian +< CoJaBo> Honestly, that probably describes half our workforce at this + point. She'll fit in. +% +< xiaomiao> the customer is king? I'll get the guillotine out of storage ... +% +< average> I was actually thinking of getting a fanny pack myself.. +< average> idk what to put in it.. +< thrig> boiled makeshift bandages, spare ammo, cattail jelly +% +< Altreus> not my circus, not my monkeys +< mst> ook? +< Altreus> I mean apes! Apes! +% +< LeoNerd> Ohyeah strftime is a right fucker +< LeoNerd> strptime doubly so +% +< erry> of all companies, uniqlo chose yodel to deliver a 100 quid coat +< erry> are you kidding me +< erry> i'd have more chances of getting that parcel if they just + airdropped in the general direction of london +% + * GumbyPAN CPAN Upload: LUGS-Events-Parser-0.13 by SCHUBIGER +< ology> LUG nuts +< LeoNerd> Self-sealing? +< simcop2387> LeoNerd: those are stem bolts not nuts +% +< LeoNerd> English's approach to commas is much like Perl's approach to + parens on function calls +< LeoNerd> "eh sometimes maybe, if you want" +< mauke> a comma chameleon, if you will +% +< Zr40> also today: "I have an applies_to table. If the table is empty + then I want it to apply to everything" +< mst> Zr40: surely you should just use a row with a NULL pk for that +< Myon> the evil is strong with mst today +% +< kraih> serverless is just like CGI, but you have to give Amazon your + credit card instead of using a standard API +% +< thrig> Cisco also used to have a "fixup SMTP" for some of their switches +< thrig> it would notice "EHLO host.name" and correct it to "HELO host.name" +< simcop2387> oh god why would you do that? +< thrig> security reasons +% +-!- simcop2387-web has joined #perl +< simcop2387-web> ugh knocking the power loose on your SAS expander + causes all kinds of weird issues and zfs going "holy + fucking shit what did you do, all your disks are dying" +% +Sales: "Can you come and have a look at this receipt printer please? It's + got smoke coming out of it." +Me: "oh wow okay, did you turn it off?" +Sales: "I didn't want to touch it, it looked angry." +% +< mauke> cpan = remote code execution as a service +< integral> turing-completeness was a mistake +< thrig> the big bang was a mistake +< El_Che> luckily, we learnt from our errors and now we have npm +% +< ology> Wow someone already favorited my one day old creating rhythms module. +< Altreus> What a supportive mother! +% +< revhippie> My last cat was a big proponent of + "catch-and-release(-in-the-living-room)". +% +<@DrHyde> i want to write ++++current_row++, to increment current_row + twice, give me that value, and then increment it again, without + the compiler deciding that "ooh, exciting unspecified + behaviour, let's sing a song about frogs" +% +< Penfold> ok. back to figuring out where my FK value went. but first, lunch. +< mst> Penfold: did you check behind the sofa? + * Penfold returns from behind sofa. One cat, a pound coin, two chargers + (plugged in and running under it) and the PSU for the powered recline bit +% +< erry> i don't smoke +< cat-xeger> You clearly fume :P +< mst> I set fire to cigarettes, erry sets fire to kitchens +< erry> that only happened once! +% +< simcop2387> my cat watches videos of birds on a cheap tablet. +% + oh wait, i read it as human language, didn't realize it was perl +% +We were told to wait for some specialist equipment to be sent to facilitate +offloading and delivery. About an hour later the “specialist equipment” +arrived which turned out to be half a dozen hefty blokes loaded into the back +of a pickup truck. -- /u/omikl on /r/talesfromtechsupport +% +< adiabatic> I just noticed the "AM" in Anechoic Media's logo +< adiabatic> this is like seeing the arrow in the FedEx logo for the + first time, but 10,000x more indie +% +< quanticle> Also, why do you have an emergency Michelob Ultra in your + adderall cave +< quanticle> More to the point: Why do you have Michelob Ultra in any way + shape or form at all +% + i'd feed this code into ChatGPT but it'd probably kill itself +% +> I swear, 99% of users think we're telepathic, and "It's broken" is a proper +> fault report +well... y'see... for telepathy to actually work, there needs to be something +on the other end 'transmitting'. nothing transmitting == nothing to receive. +% +< aquanight> # define PERL_GET_INTERP (PL_curinterp) // + seems innocent enough right? +< aquanight> cannot seem to turn up a *definition* of PL_curinterp anywhere +< aquanight> it clearly exists. It clearly *has* to exist somehow. +% +< erry> BRAINS +< Hecate> erry: hiya +< erry> brain? +% +< leont> Patches welcome +< mst> not at this instant, I suspect +< mst> if I tried to suck somebody off right now they'd end up with a + foreskin full of irssi internals the first time I coughed +% + when the form requires a value for gender when u select 'other' + if i put 'teapot' will they think i'm joking + :( + GENDER: 418 i'm a teapot +% +< mst> amusingly there -is- a parser for something called graph6 +< mst> just ... not for dot +< cat-xeger> there's all sorts of things --> dot and/or graphviz +< cat-xeger> ... apparently we're nto supposed to go both ways +% +< Kassandry> I was hoping Fox wouldn't settle so Dominion could send in + the Jem'Hadar. +% +< ggreer> I think if you get killed by a saint bernard, it's + justifiable homicide +% +< mst> https://trout.me.uk/violin2.jpg +< mst> Tardigrades: Playing the violins inherent in the cistern +< Thuryn> mst, is that the violin you play in sympathy for whiny people? +< thrig> yes. sympathy. +% +< erry> > hungry, desperate feral street cat to snuggly duvet monster +< erry> these are the two genders and i'm both of them +% +< Altreus> Jen's laptop became convinced the only camera available to chrome + was the OBS virtual camera, even though OBS wasn't running +< Altreus> The only way to use the actual camera was to launch OBS +< Altreus> computers suck, has anyone else realised? +% +< davel> and oh, the 00:02 goes to Redhill! +< davel> note that there are no "00:00" trains, as "00:00" means "train + does not stop at this station" +< dakkar> ah, the joys of magic values / in-band signaling +% +< Nicholas> but it's beyond zone 6. What sort of heresy is this? +< mst> ah, yes, the "civilisation ends at the M25" londonism +< Penfold> it does. the argument is about whether you approach from + outside or inside :D +% +< Obormot> You know what, every additional answer just makes me want to ask + more (and increasingly horrified) questions, so I will take your + word for it +% +< mauke> In Poland we say "poszatkować", which means the thing that happens + to your mouth when you try to say it. +% +< thrig> maybe Theseus liked eating string candy +< mst> cursed AO3 thread titles: "Is Theseus the original ship?" +< huf> i ship theseus with its past selves in an omnidimensional orgy +< thrig> none of that was in the version of Ancillary Justice that I read +% +< erry> sometimes the games just give you an impossible hand +< erry> just like in real life +< Kassandry> Impossible hand sounds like a superhero name. +< mst> or a combination yoga pose and masturbation technique +% +< Obormot> 'Under orders of the State Media Oversight Committee, + the next edition of "War and Peace" will be retitled + "Special Operation and Treason."' +% +< erry> i don't care for the coronation but i do care for having tomorrow off +< erry> can we just coronate someone every week +< erry> maybe they should coronate the curernt conservative pm.. I mean that'd + be scary but we'd have a lot of days off given how long those last +% +< nickb> Sap - gradually weaken or destroy (a person's strength or power). +% +< mst> I just read this so now you have to as well: "Migrating the data + took a week. The first issue was how large our database is: 40gb." +< joepie91> ah yes, one of those phrases that seems completely innocent + unless you understand the implication +% +< cat-xeger> my cat branch grows bi black polydactyl cats +< cat-xeger> big +% +< Kassandry> *raises water bottle* To being weird! +< cat-xeger> campai! +< Kassandry> *swigs* +< cat-xeger> <-- waves arm about, confuses cats +% +< mst> yeah, so materialise that data via WITH or a subselect +< Penfold> or a separate select, as we have the data in hand cause we just created the fucking rows +< Penfold> mmmmduh +< Penfold> BRB +% +< mst> Ada would have trouble outsmarting a rock +< Kassandry> She has. She whapped one with her paw and was surprised it hurt. +< Kassandry> And then whapped it again. Three times before she caught on. +< Kassandry> So yes, she's had problems outsmarting rocks. +% + "most women want andrew tate" my uterus has got its shotgun and + locked itself in its room +% + you, more smug than usual? that would be quite a thing :P +% + Watching Spongebob musical later this month in london :D :D + Can't wait + Who lurks in the memory under the C? SPONGEBOB SEGV +% +< mst> ... oh for crying out loud, it's the blowjobs spambots again +< mst> cunts. +< mst> (well, ok, slightly inaccurate, I'm sure the fucktards running + them have neither the warmth nor the depth ...) +% + well that was fun, let's not do that again +% +Thus mathematics may be defined as the subject in which we never know what +we are talking about, nor whether what we are saying is true. + -- Bertrand Russell +% +< nox> How do you call a genderfluid person who is lactose intolerant? +< nox> Non buy-dairy +% +< cat-xeger> a friend misread terciel as tactical. I like the idea of + tactical cat cuddles +% +< erry> oh wtf is going on +< erry> that looks like chatGPT had a seizure and then wrote code +< mst> well, yeah, but other than it being python? +< erry> oh shut up :D +% +< erry> i wish i could clone myself +< erry> but then I'd have to deal with my clones +< erry> I no longer wish I could clone myself +% +< Kassandry> *vrrrrrrm* +< erry> yes, that is the sound of over-caffeinated erry +< Kassandry> Like a gnome set on vibrate. +% + why don't washing machines have an 'incinerate' option + because you'd select it by mistake +% +< Kassandry> Nobody wants commander? That'll disappoint Riker fans. +< mst> now I have a mental image of Will Riker biting Secret Service agents +< Kassandry> I think he would, especially during jamaharon. +< mst> [[ominous horga'hn music]] +% + * Penfold buys an MDF laser flatbed cutter. go me. +< Penfold> Caution: do not look into laser with remaining eye. +% +< erry> if i dont beat myself up, someone else will +< erry> and it'll be worse +< sungo> get a magic marker, draw a penis on your forehead. then you and + everyone else are done with the shaming +% +< alethkit> "No one has ever been eaten by their pet knife" +% +13:01 < Zr40> the desk frame made it upstairs. Next, the surface +13:14 < Zr40> reassembly time! +13:38 < Zr40> You found loot: 1x Toe Cramp +13:38 < Zr40> ow +% +< erry> sounds like some sensible economics +< erry> capitalism means chart keep going up forever + * xiaomiao looks at average temperature +< xiaomiao> welp, can't deny the capitalism +% + * Leolo curses at his faulty UPS +< LeoNerd> Is it an Unhelpful Power Supply? +% +< mst> I don't think 'insane' has ever stopped any of us +< sungo> of course not. but I think it's at least important to give a + knowing nod to the insanity on the way past to make it clear we + understand each other +% +< cat-xeger> <-- tries opening one eye at a time +< cat-xeger> ... loses count +% +< Mithaldu> the most potent english weapon is the cuisine +< Mithaldu> also shoddy construction standards +% + Yes, devs, when you use your words, I can get you what you want. +% +< Kassandry> I love how RDS hangs and cloudwatch alarms mean nothing and I + can't ssh into the server and fix it so yay $255/hr support + when we get it approved. +< Kassandry> Goatfucker. +% + Sorry lost my phone under a cat +% +< TrueWolves> I can write in a sub-2 font size. +< cat-xeger> can you read it? +% + yet again i'm like mx paranoid +% +< erry> my rolling wardrobe doors are slightly out of place but i can't fix it +< erry> so probably they're going to fall put and kill me in my sleep +< Kassandry> erry: Got really kinky, eh? Broke wardrobe doors. +< erry> i was careless when coming out of the closet. +% +< kraih> at this point i spend like half my working day in video calls :S +< mst> oh, right, you've reached -that- level of seniority +< mst> congratumiserations on your career progression +< kraih> *sob* +% +< erry> Erry has the following attacks: depression, anxiety, cry, code +% + What do a man who's had a vasectomy and a Christmas tree have in common? + Decorative balls. + Not just decorative, I reclaim the protein and feast upon it, absorbing + the many potential babies, it's why I can't visit Alabama anymore...